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You find someone willing to do a medical procedure (preferably a friend) called a fistula to connect your bladder and rectum so you pee and poop at the same time out of both orifices. Next you take an exaggerated number of laxatives or give yourself C. Diff to make everything inside of you liquid. Take your friend and you shit and piss out of both your butthole and peehole all over their face.
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