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Types of New Zealanders:

- Aucklanders
- Mongrel mobsters
- Islanders
- Bogans
- Deep [Southerners]

Aucklanders are trying to fit in with the rest of the world and assimilate with [American culture] by creating over-dramatised reality TV shoes and watching too many movies. In reality they are struggling to find their kiwi identity because they are so locked into their [metropolitan] lifestyle.

Mongrel mobsters are Maori folks who are pissed at the racial injustices of the past and lash out against the Pakeha imperialist regime through violent anarchy and civil disobedience. All mongrels are dangerous but not all are immoral. Some mobsters work a positive change in their communities by fucking up any dickheads who try to sell harmful drugs to their whanaungatanga.

Islanders are other Polynesian folks who have immigrated to Aotearoa. Islanders are usually devout Christians who love wearing their church clothes and lava lavas, sipping kava and eating pork roasts.

Bogans are rural nutcases who enjoy drinking beer, driving beat up Holdens, and listening to Metallica. They typically have long mullets, few teeth and no shoes.

Deep [Southerners] are usually white folks of Scottish descent who live in the cold, isolated district of Otago and speak with a thick accent, if they speak at all. [Southerners] are quite possibly the most hard case, tight lipped people you will ever meet and don't take shit from any pussy arse townies.

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