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n. YOU-ni-corn A unicorn is a magical animal that can only be seen by the purest of the pure-hearted. Ancient accounts suggest that unicorns look like a horse with a spiraled horn protruding from the middle of its forehead. Not to be confused with a Pegasus.

Unicorns are majestic creatures, and some say that from one touch of their horn, they can heal anything.

A more modern twist to the mythological beast is that unicorns can fly without wings. Instead, they are propelled by the rainbows they fart out. They have been known to sneeze skittles and poop ice cream, and eat anything with sugar in it.

A unicorn must never be captured, as when it is, it turns into something looking like a large, orange, slimy object with one eye and a toupee. If this happens, it means that the unicorn has lost all their magical abilities and their will to live, along with their beauty and their brains, so they are basically a lump o slime and nothing else. Luckily, as the purest or the pure-hearted never do such things, this has never happened, but if you do see someone attempting to push a large, neighing, invisible mass into a cage, then please stop them, as it is debated that the capture of a unicorn will lead to the destruction of humanity.

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