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n. Wang·pire- A wangpire is an entity who nibbles wangs for sustenance, feeding upon the protein inherent in semen. They prey upon lonely males of about 20-75 years old. Recent studies indicate a preference for Columbian men between 65 and 67 years of age. Much like the fabled vampires of old, the wangpire has strong aversion and weakness to certain substances. Among them are herpes, vaginas, and Rachel. Many come to wangpires in hopes of sexual release but come away haggard, sickly, sterile, dead, or a wangpire themselves. All wangpires were, at one time, human, but have since mutated by having another wangpire bite their penis in mid-fellatio.
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