bong monkey

Any primate who is a frequent user of marijuana (usually confined to chimps or bonobos because of the intelligence required to operate a water pipe) can become a bong monkey. Traditionally, a bong monkey is initiated into marijuana usage by a human user of the drug, and twosome unite as constant companions. The bong monkey usually serves as a type of "helper monkey," with the monkey acting as caretaker of the pipe- packing the bong with the dried buds and leaves of the marijuana plant, replacing the water when it becomes foul and cleaning the pipe. However, there have been cases of bong monkeys continuing to use the drug after severing their relationship with their human friends. Bong monkeys are very protective of their bongs. Human stoners find kinship in the relaxed approach to life common in many apes who spend their days sleeping, feasting and copulating in fruit-bearing trees. Bong monkeys don't judge their human friends' lethargic habits. Some bong monkeys have been known to play video games and provide cogent analysis of Tool lyrics.