Soft Handz
EARLY LIFE/BACKGROUND Soft Handz also known as "Beans" is a well known gangsta rapper, popular through out the 1990's. Soft Handz was born into a loving upper middle class family in northeast Topsfield. Despite his rather "un-gangsta" upbringing by the age of 9 Handz was selling weed the local project of Willowdale. It was not until his scientist sibling who is currently incarcerated for his second drug distribution conviction, suggested that handz sell the deadly street drug crystal meth that his drug dealing took off. As soon as the drug duo started creating meth in their parents basement and by the age of 18 handz had become one of the biggest and most well established drug dealers in the tritown. It would not be long however until Soft handz' life would take a turn for the worse. Just asfter moving a giant sale of meth in the notorious drug neighborhood Meeting House he would be arrested and later find out that his customers were undercover cops. Soft Handz was sentenced to 23 months in prison after cutting a deal witht he D.A. PRISON While Incarcerated Soft Handz spent most of his time writing in his journal and reflecting on his short and troubled life. On a visit that would later be reenacted in one of handz music videos, he met with longtime friend Dr. Knowledge. During the visit Handz discussed that when he was released form prsion he would persue a career in adult film. Dr. Knowledge then held up Beans' fourth grade year book in which he proclaims, "When I grow up I want to be a rapper." Soft Handz spent the remaining 14 months of the jail time writing raps and battling othe jailed emcee's in shower time battles. CAREER Upon his release from prison the 22 year old Topsfield native signed to fellow gangsta rapper, Dr. knowledge's record label, "Dangerous Mutha Fuckin' Records." The signing would launch Handz' prolific rap career. Beans dropped his debut album, "Meth Money" which despite being abnned from all radio staions went platinum. Soft hands was notorious for his lyrical onslughts of fellow tritown rap artists. He also is credited with destroying the entire "crunk movement" with his destructive and furious diss track entitled "Crunk reaper." This amazingly influential song stripped the enitre south of all rap credibility and caused the collapse of all southern rap labels. Handz went on to release his sophtmore album "Reckless Endangerment" followed by "A T-field Story." After releasing his third album rumors surfaced that Soft Handz was struggling with an addiction to prescription drugs. The rumors were never sonfirmed but soon after they surfaced Handz Left "Dangerous Mutha Fuckin' Records." He then started his own label "Soft Handz Inc." Beans' first album on his new label "Soft Handed Bandit" recieved mediocre reviews and jsut didn't seem to have the same gangsta edge as his previous albums. He tried again with his fifth album entitled "Guns, Meth, and Money." Once again this album just did not impress the streets like the records on "Dangerous Mutha Fuckin' Records." Beans decided that he would retire form the rap game. During his retirement Handz' worked with sexually abused animals and traveled the world. Though he enjoyed his retirment Handz decided after three years it was time for him to get back in the rap game and returned with his comeback effort "still got it." Beans continued rapping and released three more albums including arguably his best effort, "fuck Me Sideways." Longtime friend and former label mate Dr. Knowledge presented Handz' with an idea of doing a concept album, but he declined stating that would "wreck his image." Handz's went on to wirte his tell all autobiography entitled, "Handz': Yours Truly" In the book he describes hows he went from a small town hustler to a multi platinum rap legend. This book stired up some controversey becuase Handz' insisted that he is a descendent of Leonardo De vinci. He also claimed he apparently has lunch with Jesus atleast once a weak. It was around this time that the public started speculating about Handz' drug use becuase of his wild claims in the book. POST RAP CAREER After Soft Handz announced his second retirement from rap he announced that he would be trying his hand in the adult film industry. Handz went on to produce such classics as "Blowski's and more Blowski's" and "Peter's Passion." Though it seemed Beans drug dealing days were in the past he went back to his old ways and was arrested with 63 kilo's of crack cocaine. During his trial Beans claimed that a higher power had forced him to return to selling drugs. The court ruled that Soft Handz would be better suited in rehab rather than prison and was sent to Rappers Rehab, where he spent only 3 months. Currently Soft handz resides in Topsfield in his med evil style castle in the very spot that he grew up. He claims to be clean but it is suspected that soft handz still abuses drugs due to his erratic behavior and the fact that he insists that he is infact immortal and is actaully 347 years old. Soft Handz will go down in history as a legendary gangsta rapper who became rather strange after his retirement.
The Urban Dictionary Hoodie
Mr Tulppo Is next This hoodie is my favorite article of clothing
Would be South better to have the definition on it as well like we used to be able to customize tshirts, sweats or mugs especially at the higher prices…
Absolutely brilliant my Argentinian son wi be very pleased
My boy like the hooded attire.
Navy Quality Goods Awesome! My girlfriend Becca loves it!
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Nice It's pretty good to describe my mood around my parents!! Love this! Make more!
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i said shart and wore it to a party
wrote shart and wore it to a party
SUPER SIGMA. I LOVE IT.
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Pretty good It isn’t very hot and sweaty but other than that it is pretty good
TO THOSE ASKING, YES, THE GORGEOUS MAN COMES WITH THE SWEATSHIRT BUTTTT YOU HAVE TO PAY 100 TIMES MORE THAN ASKING!
Better then Gucci and LV I bought 3 of these and omg I’m done it’s literally the best hoodie I have ever worn.Its so good that I think the hoodie give me powers like Shaggy.I hope this becomes better than any other brand that’s how good it is.
Orderd a large hoodie about two years ago and the print in still holding up. I recently order a XL just do to the fact that the original has shrunk a little. The new hoodie is made with thicker material and fits perfect. I recommend ordering one size up.
Hahaha hoodie says cum dump and I wore it in public
Question… does that gorgeous man come with the sweatshirt? I will gladly pay 100 times more than asking!
bro my dog started barking when I wore this hoodie, he started talking in spanish and was like "Aiiiiii te ves sexy ¿Puedo conseguir tu número?" and then he did the stanky leg before he packed his bags and got 3 tickets to bikini bottom. I asked him who the other 2 people were and he told me "nah i just tryna sleep". Had to respect the dog, he got that dog in him. but yeah the hoodie was warm
made me look like the gyatt rizzler,the girls loved it!!!
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your hoodies at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from side to side
C - Sleeve Length
Measure from center back collar, over shoulder, down to cuff
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27" | 20" | 33½" |
| M | 28" | 22" | 34½" |
| L | 29" | 24" | 35½" |
| XL | 30" | 26" | 36½" |
| 2XL | 31" | 28" | 37½" |
| 3XL | 32" | 30" | 38½" |
| Size | Length | Width | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 69 cm | 51 cm | 85 cm |
| M | 71 cm | 56 cm | 88 cm |
| L | 74 cm | 61 cm | 90 cm |
| XL | 76 cm | 66 cm | 93 cm |
| 2XL | 79 cm | 71 cm | 95 cm |
| 3XL | 81 cm | 76 cm | 98 cm |