ginger

gingers. the bottom of the food chain, i suppose. where did they come from? nobody knows. except i, Master Ginger Orgy. You see, long ago, as the galaxies formed, a spectacle was seen, a small red flicker shooting off into the distance. Upon further inspection, it could be seen that this flicker began to evolve. Long, red strands of hair-like straw began to dance with space’s nonexistent winds. Over time, these strands isolated from each other, each taking on its own death mission to infiltrate humanity with ginger dickheads. A large clump of this hair was found in a solar system located 6900000000000000 light years away, scientists are looking into this further but are currently calling this Gingerus Orgyamus. Rest assured, a minuscule amount of hair travelled to our planet, Earth, where it germinated a small soul floating in endless terror. This soul was birthed by a forlorn mother who goes by the name Imogen Sheeran. This hair infected her through the womb, making her hair a reddish/strawberry blonde colour. The child that popped out her pussy was found to be containing the soul in which had been germinated. This man was… Ed Sheeran.